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crônicas

Exile

 

Untitled-1

I arrive in Florianópolis on a Wednesday – mid-week, mid-life, half-stressed.

I seek seas, hills, women and better living conditions…

and I find them,

and I find them,

and I find them,

and I find them.

They have 42 beaches here.

Forty-two beaches?!

One for each year of my life.

Why so many?

Why so many?

I’ll find out.

Even if it takes me the rest of my life.

I hop in a taxi and ask the driver to take me to the lagoon.

I want to eat grilled fish with capers.

The taxi driver says he knows the owner of a restaurant in Ponta de Baixo, good and cheap, irresistible.

The stress is being blown away by the breeze (perhaps to join the big stress there in Curitiba). A beer, a fish, the waves, the nymphs, the clouds …

I’m starting to contemplate moving here.

Live on the beach, work in the city.

I go back to my hotel and a wave of laziness hits me.

I look at the bay from my window: torpor, languor, lethargy…lying on a hotel bed where hundreds of people have slept, had sex, rested.

I want a woman … but, instead, Morpheus comes.

He wraps me in arms made of night, and he looks at me with his starry eyes …

and sleep comes …

and the dream comes.

I am in a boat, in the middle of a placid lagoon, a blue expanse fringed by a border of buildings, bridges, hills.

Is it Florianópolis?

I have a book in my hands, but I cannot read anything, not even the cover.

I hear a shrill noise that pulls at me.

It sounds like an alarm clock.

What the hell!

Who places an alarm clock in a boat?

I’m looking for it.

I cannot find it.

Placidity turns into anguish.

Awoken!

Wake-up call.

The reception had already called the taxi that will take me to the bus that will take me back to Curitiba, back to reality.

Desterro

Chego a Floripa numa quarta-feira – meio da semana, meio da vida, meio estressado. Procuro mares, morros, mulheres e melhores condições de vida, e as encontro, e os encontro.

Eles têm 42 praias aqui.

Quarenta e duas praias?!

Uma para cada ano da minha vida.

Pra que tantas?

Pra que tantos?

Vou descobrir. Nem que leve o resto de minha vida.

Pulo num táxi e peço ao motorista que me leve à lagoa. Quero comer peixe grelhado com alcaparras. O taxista diz que conhece o dono de um restaurante em Ponta de Baixo, bom e barato, irresistível.

O estresse vai sendo soprado pra longe pela brisa (talvez para juntar-se ao estressão lá em Curitiba).

Uma cerveja, um peixe, as ondas, as ninfas, as nuvens…

Começo a pensar em mudar para cá. Morar na praia, trabalhar na cidade.

Volto ao hotel e a preguiça bate.

Fico olhando a baía da minha janela: um torpor, um langor, uma letargia…

deito na cama de hotel onde já dormiram, transaram, descansaram centenas de pessoas. Queria uma mulher… mas quem vem é Morfeu.

Enlaça-se em braços feitos de noite, e me olha com seus olhos de estrelas…

e o sono vem…

e vem o sonho.

Estou num barco, no meio de uma lagoa plácida, uma amplidão azul franjada por uma borda de edifícios, pontes, morros. Será Florianópolis? Tenho um livro nas mãos, mas não consigo ler nada, nem a capa. Ouço um ruído estridente que me puxa. Parece um despertador.

Que droga!

Quem coloca um despertador num barco?

Procuro-o. Não encontro. A placidez transforma-se em angústia. Desperto.

Telefone-despertador.

A recepção já chamara o táxi que me levará ao ônibus que me levará de volta a Curitiba, de volta à realidade.

(Illustration by Key Imaguire Júnior)

Por Edson José Cortiano

Who am I?
I don’t really know, but there are some things I can tell you about myself: my name, for instance. I’m Edson José Cortiano. I am 65 years of biological age (though I’m much younger/older spiritually) I live in the capital city Curitiba, in the state of Paraná, in the south of Brazil.

I am the proud father of a beautiful, wonderful, very bright woman called Lícia Brassac Cortiano (whom I call Lika), who’s a psychologist. When she was a teen, Lika would read Harry Potter to me, in English, making different voices for the different characters (I especially loved her Dumbledore). It was the best Harry Potter ever!

Professionally, I’m a teacher, translator, author and some people (very good friends of mine ;-) consider me an artist. I draw cartoons and comic strips, photograph, paint, illustrate books and write. I’m interested in improving myself and others physically, intellectually and spiritually. I’m into meditation, lucid dreaming, IF and moving (walking, mainly, but also wearing leg weights, bar and hand barbells).

I love nature, animals and plants, waterfalls, moonlit / starry nights, clouds, trees, grass, dogs, birds, cats – all cats, but especially my cats, Alien, Dorah and Ruby (they are my daughter’s, really) – horses ... even people ;-)

I don’t love stupidity, injustice, waste, pollution, materialism, prejudice, carnival, reality shows, people who do not clean up after their dogs, crowded places, especially supermarkets and buses and the VW van that sells donuts on my street, blaring ‘whipped cream filled donuts’, ‘crème filled donuts’ ... out of the very loud loudspeakers.

I love reading horror, poetry and comics. I write short stories, articles, plots for my comic strips (Espherozoa, The Philosopher, Chico Mate) and poems.

I love playing chess, cards and games such as the ones at Lumosity. On TV (actually, I don’t own a TV set), I only watch series and documentaries, especially on Netflix. Some of my preferences: Chasing Coral (I cried), Moving Art, Loving Vincent, The Handmaid’s Tale, Young Sheldon, Community, Modern Family, Frasier, etc.
I also love listening to podcasts. Some of my favorites are 10% Happier with Dan Harris, Lucid or Bust, Sleep Whispers, The Science of Happiness, The Intermittent Fasting Podcast, The Slowdown, Grammar Girl, and Word of the Day.

My goals in life are to be a first-class oneironaut, get 1,000 readers for my Facebook group I (heart) English, be a good companion, father, brother, son, friend, neighbor, citizen, human being, animal.

I admire smart, cultured people who are not hung up about to sex, religion, politics, who are open-minded and who appreciate good books, series, podcasts, comics, movies, songs, games, a healthy and delicious meal. You see, I’m an IF’er – one meal a day –, so you’ve got to really appreciate your food and make it count!
I also love chatting, especially live. (or, in these "beaky" times, on the phone or on Skype/Zoom/Google Hangouts...).

What I want from life?
I’ll let Clarice Lispector answer for me. “Freedom isn’t enough,” she writes. “What I want doesn’t have a name yet.”

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